I was thinking about the worst moments in my life and I found three. The first one was when I had an accident, I jumped into a swimming pool that was too shallow so I hit my head on the bottom and I broke my neck. It was a little miracle that I did not end up in a wheel chair. But here I am nothing happened!
The second one was during my PhD studies. For those who have gone through a PhD you would know it’s a very hard time you have to work very hard, and there’s a lot of stress for dead lines. I had been working for three years and I had attained very nice fellowship to go to Vancouver. Everything was ready for me to present the thesis and traveled to Vancouver. But the last month, various problems occurred one after another. Finally the time came to present the thesis and I couldn’t present it. I lost the fellowship; I lost the contract I had in Spain, so I didn’t go to Spain and was left without anything. I was thinking about going back to my parents’ house, I had nothing. It was a very hard time.
The third one is very simple. It was when my girl friend left me. Man! That was suffering. Why I say these? Now after time has past, I look back at them the very same three things were the most difficult ones have turned out to be the best.
Because of the accident I had in the swimming pool, when I took X-ray, I saw a very nice broken bone. Due to that I could avoid the military service in Spain which was horrible. The service was for one year and soldiers have to use weapons. The day they told me that I couldn’t go to the military service, I was really happy!
Because I had to change the group of my research, I began a new thing and it was very fruitful. Because of the good result, I went to Berkeley. At Berkeley, I found Buddhism which was really good!
Because my girlfriend left me, I left home. Maybe some people think that’s not so nice, but it is!
So you see, we tend to decide what’s good and bad, I want this and don’t want that, but in reality, we don’t know what’s better. I say this, because when we pray or recite Gwan Yin’s name, we always say, “Oh, I want this and I want that, please!” “Bring me a boyfriend or a girlfriend!” “I don’t want this sickness!” “I want to live longer!” In reality, we don’t know what’s better for us, so all we have to do is to be sincere, to really have faith. If you recite with faith, the best is what you will always get! Don’t bother asking for things.