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菩提田

 

BODHI FIELD

禪案點滴與感應
Some Little Chan Stories and Reflections

沙彌親和 2004年12月1日講於萬佛聖城大殿
A Talk Given by Shramanera Chin Ho on December 1, 2004 in the Buddha Hall at the City of Ten Thousand Buddhas
比丘尼恆異 中譯 Chinese Translated by Bhkishuni Heng Yi

冬季已經到了,它帶來的不僅是寒冷,還夾著熱烘烘的禪七,所以今天我想談談打坐。我喜歡坐禪,我也覺得坐禪是件很值得的事情。我們這些有機會參加打七的人是何等的有幸!我們不應該把這些機會視為理所當然,所以我想表達我最深的敬意,給所有成就這些佛事的人。特別是那些在廚房工作提供我們營養食物的同參,他們所給我們的是美味的藥;可是,那些在我們靜坐期間打瞌睡,從背後用香板打我們的監香師呢?我們也同樣對他們心存感激嗎?還是我們當他們是很令人討厭的人?這些人跟廚師恰好相反,他們總給我們苦藥吃,因此很難令我們歡喜地接受。然而,我們也應該知道,他們的工作和發心只是想幫助我們,令我們不要在禪堂裏浪費寶貴的時間,也因此我也同樣地感激他們。我們是不是應該恢復傳統,在他們叫醒我們的時候,還對他們合起手掌?

去年感恩節,我有幸與一群來萬佛城參加三日禪的年輕人在每天早上共修。他們選擇用一種很不尋常的方法來渡假:忍凍、忍痛,你說奇怪不奇怪?不過他們明白外在的疼痛是獲得內在快樂的必經過程。我們一起討論幾個話題,好比是自由和規矩的意義。如果我們問人:「什麼是自由?」他們最直接的反應是:做我想做的事。但是,這並不是自由的定義,而是奴隸。為什麼呢?因為,我們的所做所為只不過都是在取悅自私的自我。我們的私欲是永遠都填不滿的,所以,真正的自由就是要從這種暴政裏解脫。我們應該把我們的快樂建築在利他的基礎上,要打開我們的心量。我們必須要能自我約束,才能除去那些幼稚的壞習慣,這些壞習慣消耗我們的精氣和自信,所以我們不該覺得自律是一種抑制。其實,那是一種成就我們人格的一種利器。我們的心智要和色身一樣的成熟,否則我們和那些長得像大人的小孩並沒什麼兩樣。

就如同往常禪七一樣,大家最熱衷的話題總是腿痛。我告訴他們去年我在萬佛城打禪七的一個故事。當時我的腿痛得不得了,因為我不能持續雙盤坐一支香,因此覺得非常失望。這種情況持續了差不多一個禮拜的時間。有一天晚上,在聽完一片上人鼓勵我們忍耐腿疼的錄音帶,我決定在三寶面前發一個慎重的心願:無論如何,我每一支香都要挺直腰桿,結跏趺坐。那天只剩一支香就結束了,所以我坐得特別認真,心裏還惦記著我剛剛培養起來的責任感,過了沒多久我才知道自己的麻煩來了。很快地,劇烈的腿疼又來了,那種感覺就好像疼痛永遠都不會過去一樣。我要跟疼痛鬥爭到底,扭動著身子變換不同的姿勢,可是腿痛總是會回來,而且一次比一次更強烈。於是我開始害怕了,我看我就要刷新記錄,成為最快違背誓約的人了。我抓著我的腿,殷殷切切地忍耐著。在我幾幾乎乎就要放腿的時候,奇蹟出現了。我的腦子裏聽到一個很好聽的女聲聲音唱著「摩訶─般若─波羅密多─」我驚訝得不得了,一時忘了腿疼,心心念念就想要找尋聲音的來源。找著找著就聽到了引馨「叮」的一聲,這支香已經結束了!因為那慈悲的聲音來的正是時候,我才能通過這個考驗。接下來的兩個禮拜,我都可以堅持我的願力;也正因為如此,我有足夠的力量忍受疼痛,並且更能專心致志。感應在禪七結束後馬上顯現:我決定要出家了。我看透了無常和生命的短促,沒有什麼喜悅更勝於奉上我們的生命來學習、實踐佛陀的教化。

上人提過他在中國做沙彌時,在寒夜裏打坐時聞到異香的故事。這故事令我想起在日本佛寺冬天禪七所發生的親身經歷。這個故事是發生在京都和奈良之間一座山上的小廟。對我來說,此處是這個國家最神聖的地帶。在一次行香的期間,有個男眾法師來加入我們,很快地整間屋子就充滿一股很濃地腳臭味。事情的發生是有一隻小蟲跑進房間裏,剛才提到的那個男法師很輕巧地把蟲請到外面去放生。就在這個時候,那個奇臭無比的味道馬上變成花香,在房裏停留了好一陣子。這是很難令人相信的事,看起來好像是他慈悲的舉動招來這種感應,而改變了他的業力。護持一條小小如蟲蟻的生命在我們眼裏可能算不了什麼,但在護法的眼裏就截然不同了。

最後我要再講一則小小的禪宗公案。一個弟子上前問他的老師父說:「師父,請告訴我何謂無上法要?」禪師沈默片刻後回答他:「如果你想知道答案,首先你要誠心地在佛前一拜,然後我就把這微妙的法傳給你。」徒弟聽了馬上就恭恭敬敬地拜了一拜,就在他拜下的時候,他師父不經意地在他屁股上猛踢一腳,接著馬上問他:「你得到要領了嗎?」做弟子的被師父突如奇來的一招惹得不禁破口大笑,於是他開悟了。他說從此以後,就再也沒有停止笑過,他徹底地了解心經上講的「一切無所得」的道理。阿彌陀佛的淨土和我們之間的距離,就等於我們的無明那麼厚,可是無明有厚度嗎?


Winter has come, and with it not only the cold weather, but also the hot Chan sessions, so I will relate my talk of today to the topic of Chan. I like Chan sessions. Somehow I am aware of how worthy they are, and how fortunate are those of us who have the opportunity to participate in them. We should not take them for granted, so I want to express my deepest gratitude to all of those who make that possible, especially to those who work in the kitchen and provide us with nutritious food every day. We could say that they give us a delicious medicine. However, what about the proctors--those guys who approach us silently from behind and hit our back with a stick when we are sleeping during the sitting periods. Can we also feel gratitude, or do we just see them as very annoying people? In contrast to the cooks, they give us a bitter medicine, and it requires some effort to gladly accept it. Nevertheless, we all should know that their work and intention is to help us to not waste our precious time in the Chan Hall, so I am also grateful to them. Should we revive the tradition of putting our palms together when they wake us?

Last Thanksgiving, I had the fortune of meeting every morning with a group of young men who came to participate in a Chan session of three days held here at the City of Ten Thousand Buddhas (CTTB). They decided to spend their vacation in quite an unusual way: enduring cold and pain. Wouldn’t you say that’s strange? Somehow they know that this external suffering is something that has to be endured to gain internal happiness. We discussed several topics, such as the meaning of freedom and discipline. If we ask anyone what is freedom, their most direct answer will be: “to do what I want.” However, this is not the definition of freedom, but that of slavery. Why? Because what we want is just to please our selfish ego, which is never satisfied. Therefore, true freedom is to be liberated from this tyranny. It is to base our happiness on following wisdom and not egotistic desires and egocentric impulses. Freedom has to be looked for in altruism, in expanding our minds. Self-discipline is necessary to eliminate those childish bad habits that drain our energy and confidence, so we should not feel it as repression but as a tool that allows us to grow as human beings. Our minds should catch up in maturation with our bodies; otherwise we will be no more than children with the appearance of adults.

As usually happens during Chan sessions, the starring topic was pain. I told them a story that happened to me in the last winter Chan session here at CTTB. At that time, I was dealing with such intense pain that I could not finish the sitting periods in full lotus, which disappointed me a lot. This situation continued for about the first week of the session. But one evening, after listening to a tape of the Venerable Master encouraging us to endure extreme pain, I decided to make a formal vow in front of the Triple Jewel: I would sit straight in full lotus every sitting period, no matter what. That day there was just one more sit before finishing so I sat ceremoniously, aware of the responsibility that I had just acquired, and it did not take that long before I realized I was in big trouble. Very soon the pain was so severe that the idea of going like that for the whole period seemed impossible; that period seemed to last an eternity. I wrestled and twisted my body in all possible forms, but the pain always came back, even stronger, so I panicked. I was about to establish the new record of the fastest broken vow ever taken. I grabbed my leg and with the seriousness that the situation required, I was just going to put it down, when the magical happened. Inside my head, I could hear a very melodious voice singing: “Maha Prajna Paramita.” I was so surprised that I forgot the pain and just tried to investigate where that voice came from, and I was engaged in this when I heard the “ting” of the bell indicating that the sit was over. I had passed the test thanks to the help of that opportune and compassionate voice. During the remaining two weeks of the session I was able to maintain the vow; somehow, it endowed me with enough strength to endure pain and to concentrate better. The response to this effort came right after the session finished: I decided to leave home. I could see very clearly impermanence, how short life is, and that nothing can surpass the joy of devoting our lives to studying and practicing the teachings of the Buddha.

The Venerable Master mentioned how sometimes he could smell delicious fragrances while he was a novice in China and had to sit in meditation during the freezing nights, and this reminded me of a personal story that happened in a Japanese temple during a winter Zen session. This was a small temple located in the mountains between Kyoto and Nara, for me the holiest region of this country. During one of the walking periods, a monk joined the rest of us, and soon the room was filled with the unmistakable foot odor. That was the situation when a little insect entered the room, and it was this monk who delicately took it and put it outside, and just then the very same stinky smell changed into a flower scented fragrance that lingered for a while. It was hard to believe. It was likely his compassionate deed that provoked this response. Saving the life of a little insect may look meaningless to our eyes, but not to the spiritual Dharma protectors.

I want to finish by sharing with you a little Chan story: a monk approached his old Chan Master and asked him: “Master, could you please tell me what is the ultimate and most essential meaning of the Dharma?” The Master remained silent for a while and then replied: “If you want to know it, first you must bow once with utmost sincerity and respect in front of the Buddha image, and then I will transmit this sublime teaching to you.” The disciple did not wait a single moment, and proceeded to bow to the Buddha with great reverence. And as he was doing so, the Master approached him and unexpectedly “pum!” kicked his bottom! And the Master immediately asked him: “Did you get the teaching?” The disciple was so startled by the bizarre situation that he burst into laughter and got enlightened. He said that after that moment, he never stopped laughing for the rest of his life. He thoroughly understood what the Heart Sutra says: there is nothing to be attained. Amitabha’s Pure Land is as far as the thickness of our ignorance, but does ignorance have a thickness?

Amitofo.

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