記得在去年（1996 年） 6月初（近端午節），我們一家三口到荃灣芙蓉山竹林禪院處，得到一位法師帶引，見了另一位大師。我很清楚地記得這位大師坐著解答我疑問時，他雙腳板朝天，有時半閉目，帶點威嚴，卻不失給人平易近人的感覺。更難得是每問每答都令我心服，而能從中悟出一點道理來。真是有懾人心魄，刻骨銘心的教化道理。
直至農曆 7月 15那天－－當時我不知道這天是佛歡喜日－－獨自帶著兒子再到竹林禪院去，終於見到了曾帶我引見大師的法師－－釋光法法師，我就向他說明來意，想找那位大師問投歸善師的事。當時這位光法法師神情帶點不知所措，像跟我沒見過面似的，要我自己到處找找看，有沒有我想找的法師，他則要到大雄寶殿禮佛。他兩小時禮佛後回來，問我找到想見的大師了沒？我當時不知為何只搖頭示無，並哭得很利害。他隨後拿了一本書出來，一邊打開一邊說話時，我看到書本內的一張照片正是我曾見的大師和想找的人，立刻用手一指說：「是這位。」光法法師聽了說：「好有緣，本書送給你看，寶書。」我道謝後接過書，也沒有時間看書上的字題和內容，就拿著它當寶物般帶回家。
I am a married woman; my husband’s family name is Yuan, and we have a six-year-old son now. In my house, I have a Guanyin image on the altar, and next to it I have kept a picture of the Venerable Master Hua for almost a year. I also have the book In Memory of the Venerable Master Hua.
Back in the beginning of June, 1996, (near the time of the Dragon Boat Festival), our family of three went to the Zhulin (Bamboo Grove) Chan Monastery in Quan Bay, Furong Mountain [Hong Kong]. We were led by one of the Dharma Masters to another Great Master. I remember quite clearly when this Great Master answered my questions. He was sitting in full lotus with his eyes half closed. He looked stern, yet we felt drawn to him. Each and every answer he gave me was truly convincing and gave me insight into certain principles. His words shook my soul and touched my mind; it was an unforgettable teaching. Afterwards, I longed to see that Great Master again. Whenever there was a holiday, the three of us would go to that monastery to see if we’d be lucky enough to meet him and ask for some more teachings. For two months we tried to find that Great Master or the Dharma Master who had led us to him, but we had no success.
On the fifteenth of the seventh lunar month (which I didn’t know was a Buddhist anniversary) I went with my son to Zhulin Chan Monastery again, and this time I finally found the Dharma Master who had taken us to the Great Master before. (He was Dharma Master Guangfa Shi.) When I told him the reason I was there and that I wanted to be the Great Master’s disciple, he looked at me as if I were a total stranger. He didn’t know how to react. He asked me to look around by myself and see if I could find the Great Master. He then went to bow to the Buddha at the Buddha Hall. After two hours of bowing, he asked me whether I had found the Great Master. I didn’t know what to say, so I shook my head “no” and broke down crying. Later, he showed me a book. While he was flipping through the book and speaking to me, a picture of the Great Master caught my eye. I immediately pointed at the picture and said, “That’s him.”
Hearing my words, Dharma Master Guangfa said to me, “This precious book is for you, since you have such an affinity with it.” I thanked him and took the book without noticing its title or contents. I carried it home as if it were a precious treasure. When I got home, I couldn’t wait to read it. When I opened the first page, I don’t know why but an uncomfortable feeling arose. It seemed as if I had lost something forever and could never get it back. I burst into tears and told myself, “You really lack blessings; only now after seeing this book do you recognize this living Bodhisattva or Buddha who was in the world.”
I insisted on thinking of the Venerable Master Hua as my Teacher. Whenever I had a question or problem in my mind, whether I am happy or sad, I would face the Master’s picture and tell him everything.
Strangely enough, once in the middle of the night, I saw the Great Master appear in my house. I was really shocked, so I went to Zhulin Chan Monastery to ask Dharma Master Guangfa about it. Following his instructions, I was fortunate enough to obtain a photograph of the Venerable Master which I took home to make offerings to.
From the beginning till now, I have really appreciated Dharma Master Guangfa’s instructions. However, he too passed away at the beginning of November. Now there is no one to instruct me anymore. I feel that I owe a great debt to the Venerable Master Hua, who in my mind is my Teacher. I also feel I have let down Dharma Master Guangfa.
May the one whom I regard as my Teacher (Venerable Master Hua), riding on his Buddha vows, stay in this world forever.
I don’t seek sympathy from others;
All I care about is having a clear conscience.
I don’t seek others’ support;
All I care about is living up to my principles.
I’d rather be a bad guy myself,
Than see others become bad.
I’d rather see everyone else fail me,
Than fail everyone else myself.