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《菩提鏡》

 

BODHI MIRROR

發心修道的恆召師
One With A Resolve to
Cultivate—Bhikshu Heng Jau

 

我出生在一平凡的家庭,母親茹素。在小時及求學期間,常隨母親至寺廟拜拜,那時對宗教也沒有什麼認識。但在廟 上禮佛時,心裡有股清靜的感受。心裡起了一個念頭,我將來可能出家修行,也不知道自己為什麼起這麼一個念頭來。

時光飛逝,轉眼我已高中畢業進入電信局服務了。在我將入伍服兵役時,在意識裡突然升起一個念頭,一直告訴我; 「必須吃素」。但想到即將入伍,軍中不知有否素食,是否方便等種種問題,於是把這念頭給壓下。在服兵役期間,吃素這念頭時而升起,且有時在我食肉時,總是 聞到一股惡臭來自肉類,食不下嚥。在這期間我開始持誦〈大悲咒〉,念阿彌陀佛聖號,一直到退伍。退伍後,立即向母親表明吃素的意願。但那時偶爾還是接受親 朋的宴邀吃些葷食。一直到一九八七年五月。在某一機緣下,終於促使我下定決心吃全素了。那就是在一次公司長官的餐會上,我依然隨眾吃些肉類,但吃到其中一 道菜時,一股惡臭衝鼻,令我作嘔,差點把口中的食物吐出。再看看同事們,個個吃得非常高興。因此忍了一陣子,才把口中的食物嚥下。自此以後,我就發願素 食,斷絕一切親朋之宴請。

一九八八年上人到臺灣弘法時,皈依了上人。自此以後,時常看上人的開示錄,知道生死輪迴的痛苦,唯有出家修行 才能了生脫死。因此出家的念頭在我的心裡愈來愈盛,一直到一九九三年上人回臺弘法時,蒙師父慈允,終於如願以償了。出家後在高雄六龜法界聖寺受訓一年多。 於一九九四年五月二十九日到萬佛聖城,入學僧伽訓練班,課餘在行政辦室工作。


I was born to an ordinary family. My mother was a vegetarian. During my childhood and school days, I always accompanied my mom to bow in the temple. I didn’t understand anything about religion then, but when I was bowing, I felt pure and peaceful. I also conceived the idea of one day leaving the home-life and cultivating, although I didn’t know why I had that kind of an idea.

Time flew by, and in a flash I had graduated from school and begun working in a telephone company. As I was preparing to enter military service, a thought suddenly arose in my mind and kept telling me, “You have to be vegetarian.” Since I was about to enter the army, I wondered, “Do they serve vegetarian food? Would it be convenient for me to be vegetarian?” With all these questions in my mind, I put aside the thought of becoming vegetarian for the time being. While I was in the army, the thought of becoming vegetarian constantly came up. Sometimes when I was eating meat, I would smell its putrid stench and be unable to swallow. During that time, I started reciting the Great Compassion Mantra and the name of Amitabha Buddha, and I continued doing so until I was discharged from military service. After being discharged, I immediately told my mother of my intention to be vegetarian. However, occasionally I would still be invited by friends or relatives to parties to eat meat. In May, 1987, a certain incident caused me to finally make up my mind to become a complete vegetarian. At a party given by my boss, I was eating meat in order to conform with everyone else. When I was eating one of the foods, its foul stench made me so nauseated I almost spat it out. But I looked around and saw that all my colleagues seemed to be enjoying their food, so I endured the nausea and swallowed the food. After that, I vowed to become vegetarian and stop accepting invitations to parties from my friends and relatives.

I took refuge with the Venerable Master in 1988 when he went to Taiwan to propagate the Dharma. Afterwards, I constantly read the Master’s Dharma talks and realized the great suffering of transmigration in birth and death. Leaving the home-life is the only way to end birth and death. My wish to leave home became stronger and stronger. When the Venerable Master went to Taiwan to propagate the Dharma in 1993, he compassionately allowed me to fulfill my wish. After leaving home, I received training in Kaohsiung and at the Dharma Realm Monastery in Liugui, Taiwan, for more than a year. On May 29, 1994, I came to the Sagely City of Ten Thousand Buddhas, where I have enrolled in the Sangha Training Program and sometimes help out in the administration office at the City.

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